Women in the sex industry understand men better than women who aren't in the industry?????

As I was burrowing through the hundreds of blogs I follow I found the link to a post by a women who strips at the infamous Magic City strip club.

Now I know what y'all are thinking, relationship advice from a stripper?? But this was an interesting post.

I agreed with some of her claims, then she completely lost me...

"Because we bare witness to so much fuckery, without having to be directly involved. Its like getting a live tutorial of MEN ARE DOGS 101. We know what it is that men really want and what they will do to get it. Being in the adult entertainment industry has really just exposed the skeletal make up of a man. Horny, selfish, uncontrollable creatures. Females in this industry have been conditioned to be a man's best friend, minus the leash. No matter how in or out of l-ve they may be, when put in the right situation any man will respond to temptation. Doesnt matter. "

I use to think like this... It's that high school mentality.  You can't trust men because you've been hurt a couple of times.  And you know what I say to that?  If you think every man in the universe is a scum bag, then all you'll end up with is a scum bag.

Now I'm not saying going into anything blind, if the signs are there that your guy is cheating, then he probably is. NEVER IGNORE THE SIGNS. But if they're not, don't assume the worst...

then she comes to the sad realization:

"Us ladies in the adult entertainment industry are not better than you, we are just unveiled, and just as raw. If you think about it, the hopes of romantic, monogamous and blissful relationships are at a minimum for us. Sure we know that there is a chance, but we know it comes at a cost. Whether that cost is your significant other having a secret affair, or lack of sex in the relationship, or some kind of a double life, we know the cost to worth ratio. The value you put on your man, better be worth the cost, from what I have personally seen, no "good" man, comes for free. Expect a loss. See? Only someone who has seen what I have seen would tell you something like that."

I respect that she knows her stance/place on her chances at love, but it comes with the profession.

check out the entire post here

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sad (not really) realization

As my loyal followers would know, I just spent the weekend visiting the hubby && I had a great time!

I won't get into details, well cuz those are for me to enjoy in my private time ;)

But anyways, today on my 6 hour bus ride (blame greyhound they make a 2 hour trip into 17 hours j/k) I decided to put my ipod on shuffle...

Now when the ipod usually comes on I play Beyonce first, it doesn't matter the time of day, my mood, who I'm with, I'm bumpin Beyonce.

But today, something told me to try something different.

So I did.

For some reason a bunch of slow r&b, angry, sad, break up music kept coming on. 

• Keisha Cole- I Shoulda Cheated
• Beyonce- Resentment
• Monica- Shoulda Known Better

the list could go on && on...

But the one thing I realized as I lost myself in the music (something I can only do in a moving vehicle appearently lol): I'm happy.

I am a content relationship wise (everything else still has me wanting more) and this is rare.  Usually there's something bad for me to dwell on or try to find flaws in the guy.
I am my own worst enemy.  I try to find ways to destroy my own happiness. I don't know why, but I do.  I start arguments.  I run away from relationships when they get too hard.  && I've been too afriad to admit it to myself.

But not this time.  I've noticed a change in me when weeks have gone by && we haven't argued lol.

What do you guys think?  Do you think this is a problem most women have in one way/shape/form/fashion?
I think we let too many outside influences come in between us && what we really want that we become accustom to not being happy/fulfilled...

Idk, its late && im rambling.
good night.

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psycho babble.

I'm visiting my boyfriend away at his school && I started to reflect on our relationship.  I compare it to other people && their relationships, not because I am unhappy, but because I am a female && we tend to do these irrational things.

Any way.  I watched how couples who weren't having sex destroy their relationship by having sex.  Some people may argue that sex doesn't change anything but I beg to differ.

If you take the time out to get to know your bf/gf (&& I mean a few months at the very least) and you get to appreciate their company && personality then if something major happened (idk they lose their job,  or are crippled... know I'm an extremist) because you care for their being wouldn't you be more likely to stand by them then...

If you guys were only having sex?? If the only connection you have with a person is a physical one then when they're looks start to fade, wouldn't the connection also??

My point is people (especially my generation) need to slow with claiming people as their bf/gf when they barely know 'em.  And they damn sure need to slow down when it comes to fcukin' && suckin'

This is just my opinion of course && I have my own reasons for the random post...
hehehe

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"I ain't have no daddy around when I was growing up...

... thats why I'm wild & I don't give (what)"-  Tierra Marie

LOL

wanted to start this post on a lighter note.

I've been noticing lately a lot of men receiving praise for taking care of their children, and I mean bare minimum.

UMMMM...

Isn't that what they're supposed to do??  If a man has a baby with a woman (willing or not, because if you didn't wanna run the risk of children you shouldn't be fcukin') then he is OBLIGATED to take care of his children.  At least a real man.

I don't get where the break down in the black family happened, but now I feel like it's irreversable.

My family destruction happened around the age of 12.  See, although my mom &&sperm donar never married he made an active effort to be in my life.  He came to school plays, my gynastics tournaments, the whole nine yards.  He was even playing daddy to my sister (we later found out that she has a different father than I)...

Then Vanessa happened... I remember this lady because for a long time I blamed her for the deterioration of my perfect little family.  This high- yellow, water head, bajan woman swept down && stole "daddy".  She had her own son, Damien, && they were all shacking up playing house.

While the visits became less frequent, the phone calls got shorter && shorter, until finally everything just stopped.  Now me being the stubborn person that I am (even back then) I felt like if my father missed me && wanted to see me, then he would.  It was that simple.  So I refused to call.  Refused to write.  I didn't ask that man for anything.

Needless to say, the child support suddenly became a problem for him after 15 years of it not being one.  I can never remember my parents being intimate (I guess they split before I was born) but there was always respect, I guess for my &&my sister's sake.  But I think that evil which was buzzin' in his ear && the respect was gone.

I can't respect anyone who disrespects their mother, the mother of their children, etc. so when I heard stories (once I was much older)  I got a sour taste in my mouth.  The man that use to play barbie with me &&talk me back to sleep after I've had a nightmare wanted nothing to do with me.

So I convinced myself that I wanted nothing to do with him.  I guess it was the only way I could deal with it then.  The only way I could avoid being hurt.

Years pass.  I'm 20 years && away at school at this point when my mother gives me a phone call.  My sperm donar had requested her on myspace.  WTF??!?! Really? Myspace?

He had sent her a message about wanting to contact my sister && I.  So many thoughts rushed through my head.  Why now? What's so different?

I accepted his friend request && exchanged cell numbers with him because I didn't want this to control me any longer.  We spoke maybe twice.  He wanted me to come visit him on spring break in Delaware.  Here I thought he was still living in Brooklyn.  He also wanted me to meet Daron, my three year old brother.

I was so hesitant.  I didn't wanna see him, Daron, Damien or Vanessa.  He had explained to me that Vanessa was no longer in the picture.  Was this why you had sudden interest in the family you left behind?? Hmm.

I didn't go see him.  As much as I thought I could handle it, I couldnt.  As much as I thought I was ready to deal with this && move on, I wasn't.  I haven't spoken to him since.

I am now 21, about to be 22 & have had no father figure for the majority of my life (besides my mom, she has been both parents for me =)).  But this leads me to ask these questions:

1. Does not having a father in your life affect your ability to interact with the opposite sex?
2. Do you think it distorts your views on what 'family' is supposed to look like?
3. Does it make you more inclined to having a broken family of your own someday??

the same goes for not having a mother around, but that doesn't apply in my case.

My point, I think, is love your family.  Learn from your parent's mistakes.  Always try, don't ever half-ass anything.

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men hate make up?!

so I was talking to the bf (as usual) after a bowled[see carnivore's dictionary] attempted at applying a full face of make up (foundation, blush, eyeshadow/liner, mascara, &&gloss) I was a little discouraged...

He began to lecture me about how much he hates make up && that I don't need it. The sweetie told me I was a batch[see c.d.] with or without the make up.

=)

My question to you guys is this: Why do males hate females in that wear make up in the real world[c.d.] but idolize the celebrities that cake that stuff on their faces??

Food for thought♥

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Dear Mr. Man.

Yea I know. I can be stubborn && irrational at times, but you knew what you were signing up for.

::sighs::

You know what I mean.

Sorry, but somethings about me will never change. I just want you to make me feel less crazy when the rest of the world tells me I'm insane.

Today, I feel like you've been making me feel like a psycho. I know I've been doing better because we haven't argued in a week.

BUT,
the minute I get upset your compassion goes out the window. You never relate, instead you make me feel like I have no reason to be feeling this way.

May be you needed this in writing, cuz I can't keep saying it.

Good night.

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Future advice columnist?

Hello all...
I am pleased to announce that I received my first email asking for advice! The sender (who wishes to remain anonymous) is asking, to some, a life altering question. I am too happy to answer the question as it is a subject dear to my heart.

The email is as follows:

"Dear PrincessaMedia:
I just wanna say I wasn't really into the whole blog thing but your's is kinda cool. You can relate to it, which is why I joined your group on facebook. I don't want you to reveal my name on your blog because those who know me or you will automatically know what situation I am speaking on.

But my question is: When do things get easier? I feel like I give and I give to family, friends, and even my boyfriend and I feel like I never get the same in return. Now all the people in my circle aren't all jerks (my boyfriend and my sisters and brothers) but the friends aren't as understanding or caring...

After I sat them down to tell them how I was feeling and what we should do to move on and it seems weeks later nothing has changed. What should I do?"

I would just like to say thanks for reading my blog! And secondly this isn't an easy question to answer. Some of the more stubborn people I know would say to cut them off and keep on moving. Some of the nicer people I know would say try talking to them again because some people never learn on the first try.

Personally, from experience I've learned that just because you hold someone in high regards that the sentiment doesn't have to be returned. I had people in my life that I felt were life long friends that turned out to be semester long friends...

You see like my mom always told me (and she's pretty wise for a young mom, lol) God puts people in your life to teach you certain lessons and that once you learn from them, they leave. So, I was learning from these people and trying to keep them in my life way past their expiration dates.

You gotta go with the flow, and not to sound cliche but if you love something, let it go, and if it comes back its here to stay. If these people are willing to leave (or in your situation, not be there like they should or just overall bad friends) let them go. If they're true friends they'll find their way back to.

Take this as a sign that God wants you to work on you. Maybe you need some more alone time or God is teaching you independence. Just remember everything happens for a reason and to learn to find the good in things.

Hope this helps
xoxo

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